It’s 2020, and that means the world is ending in… 20 years ago. Remember the Mayans?
I have a big year ahead of me, and before I start blabbing about that why don’t we do a quick little “pour one out for our dead homie, 2019” recap thingie, hm?
I started 2019 with a bang. Literally, I banged myself. Right after I got divorced.
I left NHK after 2 years, and I left the country immediately following. Spain was my destination, and over the following year I amassed experience in over 15 new countries. That is a goddamn achievement. And after respite, I’m going to rank those countries from best to worst. If you country didn’t do very well on this list, well, that’s because your country sucks.
- 15. Switzerland
- 14. Vatican City
- 13. Morocco
- 12. France
- 11. Macedonia
- 10. Bulgaria
- 9. Slovakia
- 8. Austria
- 7. Portugal
- 6. and 5. TIE – Italy and Ukraine
- 4. Canada
- 3. Serbia
- 2. Spain
- 1. Hungary
Well, that’s my list. Have you been to any of these places?
I finished the year back in Chicago, of all places. I survived a mild mild winter, and I plan on being out of here before February rolls around and is like, “REMEMBER ME BITCH? IT’S YOUR OLD FRIEND SUBZERO TEMPERATURE.“
I did use this time in my birth city to finish my book: Explicit Exploits: The Book (working title). I put out the first trailer for my new Youtube Channel, which I THINK at this point is going to be called “Explicit Explorers,” although that’s not set in stone yet. If you haven’t seen the trailer, please spend two minutes of your godforsaken life and watch it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSCT4ooI2Nk
I also did a “busy season” at Butch’s, the Irish bar I work at once every three and a half years. It was a good time, although anytime I would kick somebody out they would say, “Fuck you, Draco!” since apparently I look like “the nemesis from Harry Potter,” as one British lass referred to me. I never knew that having bleached-blond hair would be such an adventure.
2020 is starting off good. I’m ready for big things. But one questions remains:
Will this be the decade that mankind finally gets its jetpack!? I fucking hope so!
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